January 31st, 2020. First night back to Bonin family dinners in like... two months?? It feels like it’s been a long break, but maybe it hasn’t been quite that long? We needed the time at the end of pregnancy & right after Eliot arrived to just lay low though & I’m glad we did that.
He’s going to be four weeks on Sunday and we basically have a routine now that works for us. We slept mostly well this week, but the black circles under my eyes are relentlessss! I don’t remember ever looking this tired before 😂
I am dealing with guilt for the time I’ve been taking time off to honor & adjust to this new season of motherhood. I know it’s ridiculous, I hate that I feel shame. I just keep giving it back to God. I want to work & will be again (I mean, I have been, but just the tiniest bit), but I want work with peace, not work searching for peace.
Everything feels changed. Our whole world. I feel like a different person. Transformed. This time adjusting with Lionhart is precious to me & these first few weeks of motherhood are a treasure.