Sally Clarkson has been my friend since I was a little girl.
Well, I guess you wouldn’t really call us friends, since she doesn’t know me.
But my mom introduced me to Sally when I was young; through her written word, and also speaking events.
It feels like I’ve spent many hours with a cup of tea in my hand, sitting across from Sally talking about the important things in life. Getting to the heart of the matter on all things.
Whether it’s with my attitude, or my habits, or the love & words I bring into my home and to my family, it really feels as if Sally has taken me under her wing and mentored me personally.
There’s something so special about the written word.
Sally gave me (and the whole world!) such a gift when she decided to become a writer.
Mentorship in general is one of the greatest gifts. Older women taking younger women in, allowing them to journey alongside them through life’s ups & downs, with the mundane parts, difficult parts, seasons of changing relationships, and all the beautiful moments in between… it’s sweet. And special.
Recently another friend & mentor came into my life. And this one actually knows me by name. (😆)
Tammie Jurek, a wife, mother of adult children, an intentional mentor to a group of us young mothers. She’s lovingly called “Garbomb” by the children, since that’s her grandmother name, and she’s become like a grandmother to many more than her own!
In the Fall of 2022, Tammie began meeting with a group of us young moms, in a home, spending time with us late into the evenings.
Some of us on dining room chairs, or spots on the comfy couch, some on the floor, some with babies in their lap, we would discuss Mission of Motherhood (by Sally Clarkson, of course!) together, and Tammie would let us into her own story.
She shared pieces of her life and heart, stories from her young motherhood years, and passed along wisdom and encouragement. She brought us together so that we could begin knitting our hearts to each other in this group of women in similar seasons, so that we wouldn’t have to do this motherhood thing alone.
Tammie’s heart is for younger moms - reminding us to love our God, love our husbands, love our children. She lives out the wise older woman role, making us each feel seen, important, loved, and wanted in the group, even though we’re all just now getting to know each other.
Since it began, our little tribe has moved on to another book (Sally Clarkson’s “Awaking Wonder”) and we’ve changed meeting times, locations, new women have joined, we’ve spent days at the park, met at a coffee shop, had a mom swim night. It’s evolving, and every step of the way, I’m thankful to be invited. I’ve never seen anything like this. I’ve never been a part of anything like this.
It feels so special to be included in a community that is tied together with a meaningful common purpose. It’s a group of girlfriends that doesn’t take away my attention and focus from the greater things, but always draws me back.
Leaving time together with them, I’m always pointed again toward what my true focus should be. This community is so life-giving. (Speaking of life-giving: have you read the Life-Giving Home by Sally? Go download it on Audible immediately!)
Tammie has been bringing in other older women with a similar mission— making more time & space when we’re together for one on one conversation and mentorship with younger/older women.
I am thankful for the influence Sally has had in my life with her words. And for the impact Tammie is having in my life (and so many other moms right now) by pouring her heart into our community.
My hope is that this experience we’re having in our little part of the world encourages you. If there’s not an older woman in your life stepping up like Tammie, (let’s be honest about how rare this is!) please don’t feel left out. I don’t know that I’m qualified to make recommendations, but I’d tell you what I would do if that was my position right now.
First, seek out mentors through books— connect with women like a Sally Clarkson through their words! Even if she doesn’t know your name, you will be blessed by your time spent with her in her books. Second, seek out friends who have the same desire to discover beauty and truth, and perhaps put a little book group together yourself. I think you might also be surprised if you ask an older woman in your life to be a friend and guide, she would probably be willing and honored.
I feel like this is important to note. I am not best-friends-and-texting-about-everything with the women in this community. I don’t want to over-romanticize what we have or paint a false picture of what friendship in motherhood looks like for me right now. While I am so thankful to be in a circle of such amazing women whom I respect, we’re also all really in the trenches, busy doing life with our own children and spouses, in our own homes, at our own churches… I guess I want to mention that because I don’t want it to be assumed this community is perfect in some magical and unachievable way. This is just regular women doing our best and thankful to have each other along the way.
I missed that second group photo. I was up hosting the sweetest Blessingway for Mikayla right before Reverie was born. Hey, I should write about that. 🥹
PS. I asked Tammie if she had anything to add and here is what she shared:
I realized early on in my parenting adventure that I needed wisdom from older women because I saw the lack of it in my life.
I began praying asking God to show me one woman who I believed walked close to Jesus and would be someone who cared about me enough to share her personal story as a momma. God always answered my prayer above and beyond my request. So pray first for a mentor.
Be willing to take the initiative as a young mom. Older moms have just released their own children and need to know their journey has value. They need people who want to hear about it.
If you do reach out and the mom says no, then accept that this isn’t the right mentor for you and move on. Again, God knows your need and will answer in the right time.
Do not walk the mom road alone. You need people even if you are an introvert.
- Tammie